Fast on! With updates X 2 84.4kgs

 Thursday 84.4kgs

Let's just get yesterday out of the way.  So it was an up day and I planned to do 42 hours but in the end I got to 41 and called it a day.  I was hungry and Mike was eating and I was irritable and hangry.  I cannot bear to hear him eating his lunch even if I am not fasting because every bloody day he has a huge mound of crisps which he crunches his way through.  OMG I just want to run around screaming when he is eating.  So I made myself some lunch of bacon and mackerel.  It was nice and filling.  For dinner we had steak and I had some sweet potato fries and salad.  The problem is that in between lunch and dinner I ate a huge handful of sultanas and grilled almonds.  Once I started I couldn't stop.  Same old, same old.  So onwards and upwards.

I guessed yesterday pretty accurately that today I would weigh 84.4 and I was spot on.  Today I plan to fast until tomorrow.  I can do it and as the day goes on, as long as I am busy and especially exercising I can do it.  I have physio at 11.30am and then we are going out on the tandem for a few hours which should take us to 4 or 5pm.  By the time I have a shower and get rested after it will be near on bed time.  I can do this.  I have butter, brine, pickle juice and if I desperately need it I have some lardons or olives.  I want to do this.  I want to do the ADF.  There is no reason why I can't.  I have done it once and it was easy and today it will be easy too.

I read something yesterday that said every time the writer felt hunger growly pains she imagined it was a gremlin in her belly which was on the look out for fat blobs in her body.  The growls were when it saw the fat blobs and attacked and devoured them.  I am going to picture that.  I am also going to do some manifesting.  I want to picture myself when I feel slim and confident.  When I have reached my goal weight of 80 kgs and all my big clothes are no longer wearable and all the small clothes I have now are either a bit loose or also unwearable.  I will picture myself in front of the mirror looking at my lovely slimmer reflection and being so proud of what I have achieved.  I will admire myself.  I will be in awe of what I have achieved.  People will notice how well I look and how I have lost weight.  I have got this.  I will do this.  I have the power.  I have the knowledge.  I have the fasting muscle to do this and achieve what I want.  I have to act like I already have achieved the weight loss.  I think like a slim person.  I eat like a slim person.  Fasting is a way of life for me.  I look good in my clothes and I feel good in my skin.  My inner gremlin is doing it's job and eating all the fat and hunger is a sign this is happening and I embrace that feeling.

So today there is no eating plan because there is no eating.  I am going to feel fantastic whilst I fast.  My prediction for tomorrow is 83.5 and then the day after will be 83.9.  It's all an experiment of one and I will find my way.  Tomorrow I will make a plan for next week and how I am going to ADF.  I feel quite excited for going forward with this. I love to have a plan.    I will update later after the bike ride.

Today I am grateful for 

My Husband who once again has stepped up so that I don't have to cook tonight.

My resolve which keeps me going to a place where I am going to be healthier and proud of myself

The Podcasts which I listen to constantly which strengthen me and inform and educate me.

UPDATE:

So it's 1.30pm and I am still fasting.  I feel very energised and buzzing although I am very shaky.  I have been watching a couple of vids this morning and one struck a chord which is a Dr Boz video and it made me think about triggers when I eat.  I think it is boredom.  Dr Boz talked about the Human System Emotions Wheel which I looked up.  It's a bit like Mazlov's triangle.  When I looked up boredom it comes under 'anger'.  Now we all know that a lot of the time I am angry with this WOE because I feel deprived.  OMG is this the answer to all my eating problems?  I need to do some more research.  Anyway I am still planning to fast till tomorrow so I will check back in later.  Meanwhile we are off for a ride.  I need to drink some pickle juice!!

SECOND UPDATE:

It's now 9pm and I am still fasting and I feel really good.  I haven't faltered and although I have felt hungry I have eaten salt and drank water and brine/pickle juice and have been ok.

I forgot to mention earlier that I did a 30 minute pilates this morning and it was hard.  I haven't done any for at least 5 weeks so it was tough getting back into it but I did it.  

We went out for a 3 hours moving time bike ride and did just over 60kms which was brilliant and I really enjoyed it.  Mike has decided to use it more as a fitness tool and so we rarely used the motor and put in lots of effort.  One thing that worried me a bit is that my heart rate was much higher than normal and took much longer to come back to normal when we stopped at various times.  Maybe I was putting in more effort?  Normally I have a job to get my heart rate over 100 and rarely over 110.  Today it rarely came under 100 and mostly in the 125-145 range.  At one point it did go up to 150 and I had to back off as it didn't feel good.

When we got home because I wasn't eating I took the dog out for a walk whilst Mike cooked and ate his dinner.  We were out for an hour and it was good.  All together I have used 1,600 calories in exercise and no food.  I feel really good and hope for a good nights sleep now.

I have just had a shower and weighed myself and I was 83.6.  I reckon by tomorrow morning that should be 83. 2 ish and then after eating two meals tomorrow I will be 83.9 on Saturday morning.  I intend not to ADF over the weekend but then again I might.... We shall see.  I have so little to lose now I don't want to get stupid about it.  I might do 2MAD Saturday and Sunday and then do ADF from Monday.  We shall see.

Keep going Gail.  You really have got this.