It's all gone a bit Pete Tonge! 86.4kgs

 Thursday 86.4kgs


God this is so hard!  I really do have a part missing in my brain which says 'No you can't eat that!' or 'Step away from the biscuits'.  I have had my Family here for the last 4 days and they are teenagers and so were constantly eating.  Biscuits, sweets, cake and just about any other sugary food, plus Pizza, potatoes, and any other carb you could think of.  And guess what?  I ate them too.  My fasting went out of the window after 16 hours and I was constantly hungry... and miserable.... and irritable.  Poor Mike.  It just goes to show that eating sugar and carbs does create sugar and carb cravings.  It's a bit like giving up smoking or a heroin addict being clean.  As soon as you have that one hit of Smack or Tobacco you are right back there where you started.  

I feel really, really tired today.  Is that because of the visitors with no respite or is it because my diet was so horrendous and my body is rebelling and just wants to lie down in a darkened room with a flannel on my head?  To add to my problems we are supposed to be off on a 5 day bike ride tomorrow and eating out most of the time.  God knows how that is going to work with IF.

So yesterday was yesterday and today is another day.  It's sad that the last time I weighed myself I was 85.6 kgs which was a fag paper away from my first goal weight.  But hey ho we can do this.  Today I only fasted for 14 hours but I am so tired and I just could not get through any more and there seems to be a lot to do.  

I have decided that for today and tomorrow if I can that I am going to Fat Fast and then as often as I can in the following few days I am going to fat fast.  I will also try and do 18+ hours fasting after today and get back in the groove.  I know I can do this.  I know eating out is going to be a massive problem but I have to incorporate IF into my life and Low Carb has to be the way.  My big problem is I have absolutely no willpower.  I am not able to say 'No'.  How do I train myself to think about what I want to achieve before my brain says 'Oh it'll be ok.  No harm will be done'  Of course harm will be done.  Of course I won't lose weight if I am eating ice cream and pizza.  I am with the worst person in the world as well who can eat cake and biscuits by the packet and never put on weight.  

When I was giving up smoking I used to practice saying 'No thanks, I don't smoke'.  I used to stand in front of the mirror and say it over and over.  I had loads of strategies to stop me from smoking.  I know that going on this bike trip will be good and will stop me from eating and hopefully thinking about eating whilst we are actually cycling.  It's when we stop and I need to get through the next few hours of fasting window before I can eat.  I need a mantra... Mantra?  Mantra?  'Fasting is going to take me to 80kgs, and won't I be proud?'  That's a bit of a mouthful.  'No thanks, I'm still in my fasting window'.  'I'm not ready to eat yet,  maybe later'.  'I'm going to delay right now but I'll be ready later'.  'I'm proud of what I have done so far and I want to keep it going'.  '85 here I come!'  

I think it's going to be a work in progress and of course I won't have any scales so I could be in for a huge shock when I get home again next week.  I would like to see 85 kgs on the scale when we get home.  That is not an unreasonable or undoable target.  

Today I am grateful for

My gorgeous family

The Fasting Method which is going to get me where I want to be and I am going to stay there when I get there.

My curious mind.  It allows me the space to research and explore this IF lifestyle and to work out how best it can work for me.  It will work for me I just have to tweak it till it's easy.



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